Awkwardly , I had to gather the strength just to look at your face and hold my anger
 I didn't want to notice and know that kind of feelings you're having . It's not because of you , it's all because of me . I can't bear the situation that is happening to me . And I kind of not believing that it is actually happening to me . It hurts . Deeply , I know it hurts . For I have gather those feelings for so long and suddenly , you walked past me like it's never actually happen . I do all this just for you . I never want to hurt your heart . I bear it all just for you .

Others may thought that it is dumb . All this feelings and situations , it's complicated . Really , really complicated . Some may never understand my moves . And I'm not hoping that you would . I can handle this . Maybe . . What a pathetic me .

Sometimes , I wondered whether you can see that tears and anger behind my "I'm okay" statement . But I tossed that thought quickly as I realised that I shouldn't have thought about it too seriously . Or I would just hurt my feelings over and over again .  Foolish . Yeah , I agree . But , still . It is reasonable and acceptable . I never actually thought that I would actually going through this .

Yup , and I have said --> "I don't care" . I chewed bitterly those feelings and took decision just to ignore it . I want to live my future life even though without the happy "you and that person" . Now , I am certain that those fragile hopes for living with you will be fluttering away and eventually never come back . I hope that you're happy enough , for once , to build a meaningful happiness for you to have . Best wishes , Anna :')
I used to talk to you like that , and I'm telling you . I missed it
~Wassalam , xoxo